The whole week (12th-18th) was not the most pleasant time.
Kyndal was suppose to be 4 months old on the 12th. Wow, 4 months. It feels like yesterday, and an eternity all mixed into one. Not a day goes by that I don't think about her or miss her, but it's an easier kind of miss. I think I'm finally understanding life without her. I'm making it the new normal, but I would change it in an instant if I could.
My husband took me out on valentines day, which was very nice, AND, I got some gorgeous flowers.
|Beautiful Flowers (and truffles)|
|My "CHEESE" girl|
The 16th, was of course, my 25th birthday. My mom, sisters family and cousins went out to eat with me. We had a good time, but of course, I was sad.
The 17th... that day, was very bittersweet...
I'm still in shock. Today is the first day I haven't taken a test to make sure I'm "still pregnant"
My first ultrasound is scheduled for March 14th and it can't get here soon enough. I begged my OB to draw my HCG levels and everything is looking good.
The 18th, of 2011, I got this shocking news...
The news that has forever changed me as a person and a mother. The last pregnancy I will ever enjoy, and like to talk about. I know this pregnancy will be stressful on me and I'm sure on my husband, but I feel like, without this, part of my healing will not be complete.
Please bear with me if I don't like to talk about being pregnant.
I'm trying to push through this.
This has been a crazy, sad, wonderful, beautiful month. I just hope this year is better than the last.